Her Inspiration

Please Read: You May Need This.

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This weekend my family and I decided to take a trip to Oklahoma City, Oklahoma to get a fresh breath of air…oh and for a wedding. The last few weeks have been extremely busy and the opportunity to get some rest and relaxation has seemed so far fetched these days. But wait..I’m not complaining, God is amazing, things are happening awesomely fast for me and I’m grateful. In last few months I decided to re-align my spirit. Just as a furnace needs to be replaced or cleansed, so does your energy filter. How often you need to cleanse your spirit is dependent on your personal situation. I’m so grateful for the new relationships I’ve created since opening my blog and business. I thank God for surrounding me around individuals whom are in alignment with his will for me. From my Brand Strategist, PR Team, Business contacts, and etc.

However, I remember a time Of constantly being drained by a friend, well associate now. I found myself getting emotionally stressed due to all the negative energy being transferred into my life…..by this beautiful vampire. Don’t get me wrong I believe the next best thing to a therapist is a good friend. However, friendship doesn’t have to be equally yoked but friendship shouldn’t suck the life out of you, especially if the relationship is new. How do you distinguish between someone going through a “rough patch” in life and someone who is just an emotional drain on you all the time?

I know someone who never asks how we are doing and insists on dominating the conversations and dwelling on all the “pitty” mess. When the conversation shifts from all the pity me stuff it becomes very superficial. It feels like this person doesn’t care to know who we truly are, is not even thinking about how we are feeling and only maintains the relationship so they can have someone to dump stuff on or share their mess. Just ME ME ME!!! I haven’t had a friendship like this in almost 6 years and when I did. I ran like HELL!! Didn’t look back. I felt God was talking to me like I was “Lot’s” wife, ya’ll think I’m playing, but I’m so serious, I have a hard time with people who take more than they give in a relationship. It is not healthy or fair and it really puts a strain on the relationship. So what can you do? I’m a very positive person and love to minister and counsel my friends when their in need. I have so many wonderful friends, we laugh, cry, and fellowship when we gather. However, when you are doing more crying than laughing it can be toxic. Toxic-Negativity=Detox. I mean you don’t have to be mean and dismissive but you Do it “gracefully” and with “love”. Send them off with love and a prayer. Be open to the possibility that if and when they are ready to change and be more positive/supportive, then you would be open to rekindling the relationship. Keep in mind that you are solely responsible for your happiness and have to be protective of it. Don’t let feelings of guilt, loyalty or pity push you into staying in a damaging friendship. You are in control of your life and have the freedom to choose who your friends are. Remember,the reason and the season. God will shear your branches so new ones can grow.

You’re probably wondering why I chose a picture of my son….well he’s my only son and brings me so much joy.

There are two kinds of people in this life.
Those who walk into a room and say, ‘Well, here I am.’
And those who walk in and say, ‘Ahh, there you are.’
Let us each strive to be an ‘Ahh, there you are’ person’
Leil Lowndes

Meet ShantaQuilette , creator and author of Style Follows Her Accountant by trade, Lifestyle Designer, Decor Expert, Event Stylist, Cookanista, Beauty Enthusiast and Mom of three, From Denver to Dallas this fashionable entertaining entrepreneur has been styling outfits and entertaining since she was first old enough to reach her dresser and dining room table. Her goal is to ignite the creativity in all women.

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